Congratulations Wills and Kate,
We hope the bride will not be late
And if she is we hope the groom
Will not sulk off to his own room.

We hope the guests will not be crabby
And sit looking daggers in the Abbey.
We hope the in laws will all smile
And not make comments or be vile.

We hope the bridesmaids will get it right
And not fall down or have a fight.
We hope the pageboys will behave
And not pull faces down the nave.

We hope the dress comes up to scratch
And doesn’t itch or cause a rash.
The bouquet, we hope, will survive the long walks
So she doesn’t turn up with a bunch of stalks.

We hope she has something borrowed and blue
And doesn’t need to go to the loo.
Hoping heralds play a perfect tarara
We also hope it’s a comfy tiara.

We hope the Dean will not run up the aisle
We hope the Bishop will manage to smile
We hope the Archbishop remembers the names
And that Harry does not drop the ring down the drains.

We’re very much hoping to hear what they say
(It’s a major part of a very big day.)
We certainly hope no one has a bad cough 
Hiccups or sneezes or says ‘F off.’

We hope that their vows come straight from the heart
And no one, in the silence, lets off a loud fart.
We hope when signing the register of fame
That each can remember and spell all their names.

We hope when she comes back down wearing the ring
She looks happy as if she has done the right thing.
We hope it’s the start of a wonderful life
And they get time to themselves to just be man and wife.

We hope the press sometimes will leave them alone
And don’t follow her everywhere, even  her home.
But we hope on the steps they will wave to the crowd
And we do hope the cheering will be very loud.

We hope the champagne will be tasty and posh
We hope everyone will get a bit sloshed.
The photos, we hope, are a new order dawning
With no one at all looking cross-eyed, or yawning.

On the balcony, we hope, he’s going to kiss her
And we hope he aims well and doesn’t just miss her.
We hope the flypast will be easy and straight
Like the future we’re hoping for for Wills and Kate.

We wish them good luck, we wish them the best
We hope that their future is happy and blessed
For this day is not just the old royal soap –
It’s the start of the future, that’s why all the hope.
So three cheers for Wills and Kate, hope, hope hooray
We hope everything’s perfect, on your wedding day.

********************************************************** – celebrating!

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