Hospital, unfortunately. There seems to be something about dementia that attracts the worst outcome all down the line despite your best efforts to avert it.
An ambulance crew turned up with plenty of talk down the phone of taking her to a hospital twenty miles away to put a stent up her leg and into her heart. Eventually after a lot of to and fro she appeared in her own local hospital, graduating from A&E to Acute to an ordinary ward. The breathing difficulties are fluid on the lungs so she is on major antibiotics. So far four doctors have told me not to visit with a cold and three doctors have asked me why she is there.
The carer stayed with her till after tea time when my mother told her to go home. I sat up a lot of the night coughing and worrying. The neighbour is feeding the cat and looking after the house. The agency have been helpful and in good contact and a carer is going to visit with her favourite fizzy drinks. I cannot get hold of her directly to speak to her, this afternoon I can’t even get through to the ward because of high call volumes.
Although the doctors say she is lucid and knows where she is, as she has told them she lives in a big house with lots of relatives, I have my doubts.
The agency are on standby to swoop in and rescue her the moment the doctors say the lung situation is under control; I hope this is very soon, the longer she stays in there the more she is likely to become confused and aggressive.
Oh dear. The whole point of her being in her own home was that she could do what she wanted and what she wanted was to call an ambulance.
The usual mantra covering dementia care is that the care team enter the world of the demented person because the demented person is incapable of living in reality. But there’s nothing more real than a hospital world. Short of over-riding the doctors, which I can’t do because I don’t have power of attorney for health, how do I get my mother back to her own own comforting, comfortable version of reality with her carers and her cat and her endless cups of tea?
And if I’m like this when she is in hospital for a short stay, how am I going to be when the money runs out and she has to go into a care home?
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Not easy.